Tag Archives: social media

Fixing my Social Media Problems

September 14, 2020

Culture and Society / Roque Recommends

In a recent post, I discussed a few of the struggles I am having with social media. In addition to the dystopian data-mining that global conglomerates like Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram carry out, they take up valuable time from my life and important mental space in my brain that all need to go toward bigger priorities. I’ve had time to think about what to do about all of this, and now, I have a plan.

My first impulse was to quit all social media completely. The two primary reasons against this are the connections I keep with dear friends and family all over the world through social media and the free promotion I can utilize for my films, music, and other creative projects.

So if quitting them entirely is not an option, I did some research, and I’ve devised a plan that I am calling Social Media Subterfuge (SMS). It is a strategy that allows me to utilize the benefits of social media that suite my needs while avoiding their addictive and negative impacts on my time and mental/emotional wellbeing.


Here’s my plan:

SMS Tactic #1: Advanced Post Scheduling

It is actually not sustainable to post on social media in real time. You have to break from whatever you are doing and active posting keeps you inside the walls of the social media ecosystem (which keeps the powers that be in control). Through the use of a service I’ve found called Planoly, I will be scheduling my posts in large batches far in advance as much as possible on all social media. (There are actually many services to choose from now depending on your personal and business needs. Find one that works for you.) Eventually, I will go about my day while this service does all of my posting for me.

SMS Tactic #2: Remove or log out of Social Media apps on my mobile phone.

I have removed Facebook from my phone. The only social media app that I have left is Instagram, and I stay logged out when not in use. Most of the engagement now happens on my laptop at a specific time.

SMS Tactic #3: Leave my phone in another room at all times.

When my phone is near me, it feels like an appendage of my body and the inclination to fire it up becomes second nature. I cannot allow this to continue. It wastes time and keeps me distracted from the many other tasks that need attention. My phone sits and gets charged in separate and distant areas away from where I do my work.

SMS Tactic #4: I stay on social media on my laptop computer for a half hour in the mornings and do not look again for the rest of the day.

After my morning walk, I spend time checking Facebook and Instagram. I go through as quickly as possible and check in with specific people to see how they are doing. I may respond to their posts with a “like” or a comment and then move on. After all of this, I am done with social media for the day.

SMS Tactic #5: Disable all notifications.

I do not need to know how many people liked my posts and who they were at all times. That little red badge with the number is designed to give you a small but not inconsequential dopamine fix. The sense of affirmation that one gets from likes is so alluring and addictive. I am learning how to live without getting this fix. Resisting the pull of social media in any way possible is a good start.


I’ve carried out all of these tactics now for the better part of the last three weeks, and I am loving the results. Here are some of the benefits I’ve found:

  • I literally have more time for everything else. It’s kind of shocking how much time I have freed up when my default activity for every spare moment does not involve staring at my phone. I’ve finished reading 6 books in the last 4 weeks, and I’ve been consistently getting exercise every day. Cool huh?

  • My days are calmer and more free flowing. Social media tends to be a negative space fraught with posts in which people air out their frustrations and anxieties. I have been able to free up mental space in my head for my creative work and the actual needs in my daily life without dealing with all of that.

  • I’ve been able to take more control over my life. With more time and space in my head, I’ve been able to organize other aspects of my life such as my workflow with my films, my musical pursuits, and self-care. Social media has often thrown a wrench into my plans and taken me off course. Instead of practicing on my ukulele for example, I’d waste an hour scrolling on my IG feed. That will happen no more.

  • I have the satisfaction of knowing that a corporation is not taking over my life.
    Peace of mind is such a rich and delicate gift. I cannot let the powers that be at Facebook get the better of me. They want me to patronize their advertisers. They want to know what I like and sell that information to advertisers. They want to control what I see on my feed. They want to take up as much of my time as they can get. Well, no thank you. I want the peace of mind that autonomy can give.

I cannot say, dear reader, that I will be perfect in these SMS pursuits, but so far so good. I will still get what I need out of social media while safeguarding my time and mental wellbeing. The greatest challenge has been getting used to not constantly looking at my phone and firing up IG or FB. When I feel that inclination (which is more often than I care to admit), I simply put my hands down, sit still, and let my mind wander toward something else.

I will keep you all posted on how I am doing with this, and I may make a short film about it for my Youtube channel. If you have any experience and insights in these matters, please share them in the comments or on social media. (Just know that I may not respond immediately.)

However you are spending your time, I hope you are doing something important and meaningful to you. I hope you are fully steering your own ship and that no other encroaching and unwelcome entity has any say in the matter.

My Social Media Problem That Needs Fixing

August 31, 2020

Culture and Society

I have a big problem with social media. It is a dilemma that I have been grappling with for a while. I have not found any solutions yet, but I have devised a few options.

Here is the problem:

I DO NOT WANT TO BE ON SOCIAL MEDIA ANY MORE.

Okay so, on the surface, this seems fairly straightforward and simple. The next logical step down this rabbit hole would be to deactivate my Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and all other social media accounts forever.

The dilemma I have is that this is actually not so simple for two reasons:

  1. I use social media to promote my films, music, and all other creative projects.
  2. I stay connected with friends and relatives all over the world.

It does not help that there are no monetary fees attached to using social media and that I can store literally countless terabytes of data, videos, and photos on their platforms. The powers that be behind these internet behemoths have made it all too convenient and inescapable to inhabit their ecosystems.

Personally though, there are trade-offs that I have become increasingly dissatisfied with:

  1. There is a constant bombardment of advertising on these sites that continues to fuel a culture of consumerism and capitalism.
  2. These platforms utilize incredibly sophisticated technology and algorithms that capitalize on your usage habits, sensibilities, and history to tailor its advertising strategies. This encroaches on personal privacy and feels incredibly manipulative.
  3. These sites are designed to be highly addictive. I have lost valuable time scrolling through my Instagram and Facebook feeds and losing track of my day and priorities.
  4. Negativity, amid national and worldwide catastrophes like police brutality and climate change, has become the predominant currency of social media. The onslaught of negative posts and arguing induces anxiety and depression. This does not serve my mental health well at all.
  5. It is now well documented that Russia used Facebook to influence the last US election for president, and its efforts were successful. There is no justification for this under any circumstances.

I could go on and on, but these issues stand foremost in my mind.

Simply put, social media takes up mental space in my brain that I want to utilize for other priorities. I do not want to be brainwashed by advertising or a foreign country. I do not want to have a philosophical argument with a Trump supporter who won’t comprehend anything I say. I do not want to waste precious hours of my life staring at so much detritus on my computer screen.

Clearly, the trade-offs far outweigh the benefits that I derive from social media. At this point in my thinking, I feel like I need to take some sort of action. If I do not get rid of social media entirely, what is the middle ground that would make me feel better?

Here are some steps I am contemplating toward limiting my social media usage:

  • Whittle down the number of sites I use to one platform. In my case, I get the most engagement from Facebook. I could simply stop using Instagram and Twitter and focus on Facebook exclusively.
  • Remove social media apps from my phone and restrict usage to only my laptop.
  • Restrict usage of social media to specific times of the day and week. Perhaps only engage on the weekdays as if it were a job, for example.
  • Have a long term goal of phasing out Facebook by slowly migrating my audience to my website, blog, e-newsletter, and Youtube channel.

The truth is that I love using social media to create free and easy access to my creative work, and I love being able to check in on my friends all over the world whenever I want. However, I am simply not willing to tolerate the trade-offs anymore. I have reached an impasse, and I do not know what to do.

This post is a call for help and suggestions. What do you do to mitigate the impact of social media on your mental health and well being? Given the reasons and thoughts shared above, what do you think I should do?

Feel free to leave a comment below or on social media where I share this post. I could truly use some good guidance on this problem.

Thanks for reading, and please have a calm and joyful week ahead.

PS: I released a new film last Friday for my birthday. It is called “The Preservation of Self”. It is my first original work of art exploring colonialism. You can watch the full short film right here:

Do Not Get Your News From Social Media

February 9, 2020

Culture and Society

During the last presidential election cycle here in the United States, it has been confirmed by several reputable news sources and government agencies that Russia tampered with our election. I do not know the full extent to which they did this, but one of the more notable ways was through social media.

This sounds like it came out of an espionage novel, but the truth can be as nefarious as fiction. Russian operatives created fake news sites and blasted Facebook and Twitter with stories that were aimed to dis-inform the general public with slightly skewed or blatantly false information. These stories and headlines were often shared and discussed by users of social media, and with enough time and replication, the perspectives of millions of people were influenced.

Now in 2020, we are approaching the apex of another presidential election cycle. If we do not learn from our mistakes of the past, we are woefully doomed to repeat them.

I have taken the following simple steps to avoid reading news on social media (These apply toward whichever poison you prefer be it Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram).

  • Limit time spent on social media.

    This is the first line of defense if you know in your soul that you cannot live without being on sites like Twitter and Instagram. The less time you spend on these sites, the smaller the likelihood that you will click on the sensational headlines that your friends share. It’s not likely that your friends are vetting the sources of these stories or the websites they came from, however benign your friends may be.

    Avoiding social media as much as possible will significantly minimize the possibility of disinformation spreading to your brain. Try limiting use to a specific time of day for only an hour. Leave your phone somewhere hard to reach. Do whatever it takes. It’s also likely that you’ll find something better to do with your time.

  • Be discerning about what you click and read on social media

    It’s one thing to read and comment on a personal story or anecdote that a friend shares. It is another thing entirely to click on the news links people display. Not only can these websites provide false or misleading information, but they can also have malware that can get into your computer. (Again, this sounds crazy, but the technology exists.) You do not have to click on any news headlines at all, but if you have to, proceed with caution and a questioning disposition.

    I find it much more useful to connect with friends about their lives than to discuss political opinions and news. That is the filter that I use to navigate through my feeds.

  • Use legitimate sources outside of social media to get your news.

    As the previous election demonstrates, the algorithms and technology behind social media cannot be trusted. When I disengage from the addictive cult fashioned by Mark Zuckerburg and other powers that be, I seek out actual news sites for detailed information and varying perspectives. This sounds like more effort, but that’s a small price to pay to avoid the mind control that social media seems to be intent on weaponizing.

Incidentally, here is a list of news sites that I like to frequent. Have a look if you are curious, and to make it more convenient, create a folder on your web browser’s “Favorites” list to house them all for easy access. (If you do not like any of these, proceed with caution and skepticism to find others.)

This year’s presidential election will be fraught with drama and noisy divisiveness. It will be more important than ever to be clearheaded and focused on the platforms of different candidates and how you feel about them.

Stay engaged and informed, and please, do not get your news from social media.

-Roqué